I am intoxicated with alcohol right now so forgive me for whatever I say.

How was your Merdeka’s Eve?
I spent it drinking and smoking at home in PJ.
Nothing usual like me and my parties.
I admit I was a bit upset when we did not head out but Vix made it up. (:
No baby, I’m not just saying. I’m serious. It was a great one..

I mean I did not understand why I was upset.
I always thought going out for eves are usually troublesome.
The roadblocks, the raids, the fuckingsprayingthing, the jam and the RUDE ASS PEOPLE THAT SHOVE YOU IN THE CROWD.
I figure, I was probably too fucking restless over the past two weeks.
Sue me and you still won’t get an answer why. I’m as clueless.

There are drum sticks (or whatever they are called) on my computer table.
I think my brother is learning.
Righttttt. Lol.
My fingers are freezing. Fuckkkk.
Oh, Amy said Avril’s concert was boring.

No point. This entry has no points.
Night.

Today had not been a very good day at all.
I’m currently in a terrible mood, ready to shout, scream or strangle anyone that comes along and trigger my switch.

Not being able to go to Avril’s concert did not make the day any better.
Got free tickets but I have to pass them on to Amy because I have a performance tomorrow.
Bloody hell. Why did they have to call today instead of last week?! Grr.

I’d like to watch her perform her first two albums.

Tsk. Right, so people, where to for Merdeka?

Back in PJ, our heater is dead. So every single day, I wake up feeling afraid to enter the cold bathroom. It is torturing okay! Now that I’m back in KLG for the night. I appreciate my heater really much. I will now go and shower before I continue this entry. Lalalaaa.

Well yeah, I’m blogging regularly again. Can’t help it, I try to update at any chance I have.

The whole week has been a pain in the ass for me. Classes, period cramps, dance practices and assignments. Which reminds me, I have one due this Monday. Fuck. It is not that I’m slacking and do not bother about my assignment. Every night I get home from college, I’m drop dead tired. I will have dinner, I will try to destress by watching television (note : does not help at all), I will talk to Vix, I will try to sleep and eventually end up in bed, staring up at the ceiling for ages before falling asleep. The only day I had to work on my assignment was on Wednesday. That too I needed to ask for permission to leave early from practice. It’s fucked up man.

This whole TTNight thing is killing me for real. Thank goodness there’s another week left till it’s over for good. Can’t wait to have a freaking life back. I do take the whole thing seriously but I think most of them involved in the committee are taking it over the board. And no, I don’t plan to explain what’s TTNight. I admit I sometimes have fun. I admit I met and made a lot of new people and friends but fuck, this shit drove me to the point where when I’m dancing, I feel no passion. There are no feelings involved anymore. It’s purely about getting the routine done on time for the committee members to see and then get screwed for the mistakes. Then get screwed some more for being late for post mortem, get screwed for leaving home early (9.30pm), get screwed for dressing comfortably in college, get screwed, get screwed, get screwed. Kanineh. What happened to encouraging and motivating? Every single time we step up one step, you push us down another three steps. Perfect strategy lah kan.

I’m not hating, I’m ranting. I’m so sick and tired. When I say I’m tired, I mean physically and mentally and I swear to god, I am not being dramatic. I can feel it draining the fucking energy out of me. I don’t even feel like me.

I need a break. I need it so bad. To recover and to study.

To make it worse, I’ve made the decision to move out soon. And no, there is nothing wrong with my relationship. There are just things that are wrong with me. I’m so different than before, now I’m afraid of myself and for myself. Sometimes these thoughts manifest themselves so freely, I cannot control them and myself. Fuck.

I don’t intend to rant but I need to let it out somewhere. You know where the ‘X’ is.

Moving on to happier notes, my co-curicular activity started this week. I joined the swimming club. Yes, I am aware that I can’t swim. The reason why I joined is because they offer free lessons! I am able to float now.

At least this Saturday, I had a good time. Amy and I with her college friend, Sarah went to Urbanscape at KLPac in the evening. We got lost from Setapak to Sentul. For two freaking hours. Today proves one small mistake can take you very far because Sentul is like right beside Setapak. Lol. Our main objective at Urbanscape was to shop. We obviously got lots of cheap goods. I, myself spent less than RM100 and got new a skinny, new shirt, new top and a new bag. I forgot what Amy bought besides the I Heart KL tee. Sarah bought herself the brightest pair of flats. Red flats. She could not wait to rock them in college. Met a number of familiar faces there. In the end, Q managed to get tickets to enter the main stage to join Mika. Right on time for Seven Collar T-Shirt and Pure Vibrations. Thinking back, I would have had a better time if I had beer to drink like everyone else but being a chinese I did not allow myself to pay RM13 per can for a Tiger. God, I hate events like these. Always try to rip off us off when it comes to alcohol. Lol.

Kay lah. I’m going off to bed. Toodles world.

It’s disgusting how pretentious people are. I don’t know if that’s the right word to use but I’ll go along. I mean I was thinking about this for weeks and had only discuss openly with Amy so it was rather funny when Vix mentioned how I’m like that too when I told him about the incident at the mall in Klang. We’ll not get into that.

What he meant was people generally are like that and I get that. Thinking back, I’m pretty disgusted with myself.

I’ve been going through FB and Friendster as usual whenever I get the chance and these social networking sites are the perfect example for the topic today. You see people you don’t like, you like, you don’t know, you hate, you loathe, you envy, you admire, you idolise, etc on your friend list and you know only half of them. The other half is divided into two quarters where one, people you wish you are friends with in reality and the other quarter, people you only know by name and had only talk to online through IM softwares whose email too you hustle crazily to get.

Are you following me?

I know people who backstabs people they have never met and today, it appears they are girlfriends. I’ll never sunk myself to that level eventhough I pretend at times. No point trying to prove to the world I’m all that ‘real’ right? We all know the truth about ourselves. It’s good to have contacts here and there but contacts are contacts, friends are friends. Why mix two totally different matter together? Makes things complicated.

I don’t know how I’ll end this topic but I’ll stop here. Maybe another day.

…I’d like to elaborate about them but I’m tired and I need to rush back to PJ now so we’ll save it for next time.

Naqib posted up pictures of his 22nd birthday at Laundry and I stole some from his album on FB. Damn sad lah okay. My camera is a piece of crap so I’ve not bothered to take it out and my Polaroid kinda dieded for good.

Kay lah. At least now my post got a few pictures. DAMN SAD LAH WOI. At least I bought a new umbrella. Yay!

I think I have this habit of coming up with post titles that has nothing to do with my entry content.

(started changing the layout of my myspace profile for a good one hour)

Right, back to whatever I have to say. I’m currently blogging at the comfort of my own home and computer. It feels wonderful. I get to sit here as long as I want without worrying about how much an hour, no wait, scratch that, one minute would cost me if I was at a cyber cafe. I’m looking after my sister while my mom is out on her date. Yes, my mom is dating. She finally admitted to us. There are a bunch of men trying their luck but my mom ain’t one easy fish to catch. She wasn’t easy back then, she still ain’t easy now. I’ve yet to meet any one of these men but Tommy and Xin had and I trust their judgement.

And no, I do not and will not blame my mom for dating so soon. I’m thrilled that she is. She’s been through so much and too long, she needs changes. I know her well and she assured us she will not settle down. Obviously. Lol.

I am currently feeling very unwell and yet very in love. Weirdo, I am. Laugh Me, You Will Not. Cause I’m rarely this happy and it is almost unreal to me. I am appreciating every single moment before it goes away because at the end of the day, you will only have the memories and nothing else. At times the relationship gets tough due to my temper and snappiness. I’m a real witch but hey, he always managed to bring the worse and the best out of me whenever and wherever. My ego can be as big as *insert whatever* and to hear me apologise after a fight is almost scarce yet he manage to without a sweat.

I never took horoscope seriously but in this case, Leo and Leo. Tsk tsk tsk. We are arrogant bastards. Lol.

“..keep it low, hit the phone.. blablabla.. whoopsie. whoopsie. blablabla..” - iTunes on shuffle lah.

Tommy is a champion. Vix himself did not have the master copy of Whoopsie and Tommy has it. Champion.

I cannot wait until this month is over. There’s nothing really interesting to look forward to, I think. Date Week is over. The whole weekend was perfect. Early morning shopping, new haircut and buffet dinner (minus him not getting his wings whatever). I’m glad we came up with this Date Week thing. Makes every month easier to go through.

Kay lahhh. I’m lazy. I want to download new tracks. Plus, I doubt people read much anymore. LOL.

Bloody Wei Guan does not believe that I can wake up at 5am every morning by myself with no help from nobody.

It’s sorta true when I say I can, okay?!

Look who’s talking. LOL.

If you’ve been wondering where I went missing to, I’ve been working. Started work last week in KL so basically from Monday to Friday it’s all about work. Luckily I am too, otherwise I’d been bumming all the way till college starts.

Work’s fun if I don’t think about the waking up at 5am every morning and having to feel darn bad about waking up my boyfriend too so that he can fetch me to the station to get on the earliest train which is at 6.05am. My work starts at 7am, you see. :/

I have a bunch of crazy colleagues.

Do you believe you can actually make a living by going to clubs? No, I don’t mean work as a staff there. What I mean is join the competitions they have every week cause Naqib and I believe we can. =) Last Thursday I went Bar Celona again with Ker Lin, Grace and Ah Lek. Vix, Mateen and Brian tagged along. We went with hopes to drink our heart out to Alex’s generous offer of three bottles of Dewars (they are not my top choice of liquor but hey, I’ll down whatever I have) but the manager of the club wouldn’t give us the bottle because Alex forgot to call him. So fine, there was the weekly dance competition, took my chance and joined. Surprise, surprise, I walked away with RM500 cash and a bottle of Bacardi Limon. I saved the night. Lalalaaaa.

P.S: Soya, we finished the bottle in the club.

So well Naqib and I calculated, if we crash every competition in different clubs every week, I can actually earn RM2000 - RM4000 per month! But I have a feeling the club management is not that dumb, they’d prolly ban us from the club. LOL.

Ooh ooh! I found a picture of us at the freeze in Pyramid.

From Left : Neal, Vix, Brian, Me, Qib, Hell, one of their friends (lol) and Dex in the middle.

Too lazy to go through the videos. Having a headache already.

But I just gotta say this.

I had just realise that LaBella Mafeeya is the title of Lil’ Kim’s 2003 album, La Bella Mafia.

Thanks to A.S. LOL.

Okay. I miss people. I miss friends I’ve not seen in months or even just weeks.

Wei Guan.. I is the sorry!

..Or maybe not. LOL.

I MISSED KL FREEZE LAST SUNDAY! GAHHHHHHH.

I thought it was this Sunday. Makibai. According to Dennis and YungShen who both participate said it was a blast. Nevermind, nevermind. The next one.

Been clubbing way too much. Yes, I call three days in one week too much. Finally got drunk on the third night. Bad experience, I tell you. NEVER GET DRUNK IN A CLUB. Was my first time so lesson learnt.

Been doing nothing at all. There’s a dance competition this weekend though, at least I’m going to be dancing and hopefully winning some cash. There’s plan to go Port Dickson this Friday with Amy and the usual to watch the sunrise on Saturday. Sweet plan but I hope Amy doesn’t cancel last minute. We’re having beers and food and good friends. Maybe even a guitar IF any one of us can play.

Aiyaaaaa. Got to go. Plus I am sick of blogging. No pictures to put up. I am FAR TO LAZY to bring my cpu to the shop.

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I would say that it was funny if I wasn’t feeling the pain.

Monday morning I was awaken by the most disturbing pain. The right side of my back felt like it was going to kill me and no, I’m not being funny. I was moaning (screw you lah. not like that) and there were fucking tears in my eyes from my effort of trying to get up from the bed itself. No, I’m not exactly sure what it is but I’ll just say I sprained my back. Couldn’t walk properly nor lift my right leg up. Had a miserable time trying to put on my pant, I tell you. Mom brought me to a tradisonal chinese doctor and I made sure he didn’t touch me with any one of his needles that he’d use for his acupunture sessions. Found out some crap information too but I left the clinic with chopped up powders (i have no idea what’s in it so i’ll just call them powders).

During lunch, Amy called and when I was about to open my mouth to tell her my morning, she told me she thinks she broke her arm. IRONIC RIGHT?

In the end, it turns out she fractured a small part of her arm and now have to get used to her new nickname “Disabled”. No, don’t think I’m mean. I’m not insulting the disabled people, I’m just making fun of Amy because she looks so weird with her hand all wrapped up and not being able to do a lot of things. For example, eat.

Lol.

Bahh. I went to TARC today. Choices choices choices. I’m looking at UTAR now since they have the degree programme and TARC only have diploma. Kanineh. Why is the intake so soon? Tension.

Amy and I celebrated our SPM results with beer and good music. Last night was a very good night. What could be better than having beer and listening to Colbie Caillat singing live with your greatest friend and your man? Nothing.

Amy and I got to Laundry around 5ish to see all the tables outside fully booked. We were pretty disappointed UNTIL we scored a table inside of Laundry itself right next to the entrance with a good view of the stage. Hee. We were so glad we didn’t need to be crammed with smelly people in front of the stage or get blocked by super tall people standing in front of the table. Guess it was a good thing Vix didn’t manage to get us passes.

Vix, Brian and Qib joined us around 9ish since Vix got off work late and was stuck in the jam. We ended the night with yummilicious tom yam. I forgot what’s the area called but I REMEMBER HOW TO GET THERE. Yay!

Another good thing about yesterday was I finally got around to use my Polaroid camera. Was going around town looking for the 600 Color Film with Hashok and finally getting it at one of Sentosa’s old school shop. I was fucking shocked when I found out the price was RM48 per pack. It was expired too! I’m starting to think I got ripped off but hey, it was worth seeing it work inside my 78452342 years old camera. Fine, I’m exaggerating but it must have been 10 years since I last used the camera.

Pictures!

The blurred poster beside the stage.
A freaking pillar was blocking half the stage from my seat thus the picture of this poster. LOL.

Show off.

Yes. We were that bored waiting for the show to start and the boys to reach.

The bottles I had before the show started. Can see Amy’s potrait beside there?

That blur thing in the middle of the stage is supposed to be Colbie. Heehee.

In the car when Amy was driving Vix to where he parked his car near to OU. I have no clue why Brian was smiling like that but look! Colgate commercial material.

Introducing Sir Brian aka SajeevKant something something.

Amy named this “My smile sparkles!”
Another Colgate commercial material.

“I’ve just seen a face..” - The Beatles.

The last Colgate commercial material.

I’m too lazy to scan the Polaroid shots but oh! I had so much fun taking pictures.

I think some of you texted me on Wednesday asking me about my results. My phone got barred that’s why I did not reply. Anyway, I didn’t fail any subject. Got enough credits for college and I think that’s pretty much it. I am so glad I did not fail my Maths.

Talking about results means I’ve got to decide about my future education dy. I think I’ll most prolly not go to any private colleges because I’m pretty sure I will not be able to afford it even with a loan. So I’ll most prolly be enrolling in TAR College. I have no plans of moving to Setapak tho’. It’s very inconvenient for me since I don’t own my own car.

Oh we’ll see. I better get ready for work.

I’m a very very happy girl, right now.
I’m in love.
I’ve said yes to something I thought I’d never be ready for.
I’ve even considered having two.
I consider myself really lucky.
I think I’ve gone mental.
I’m glad with the outcome of the General Election.
I love spending time with *the people.
I love our time together.
I’m falling too many times in love with the same person, I think it might kill me. Lol.
I’m worried about my results.
I feel like kicking Taufoo for not calling.
I enjoy working 4 days a week.
I am glued to tracks from artist like Colbie Caillat, Robin Thicke, Sara Bareilles, Taylor Swift & Uffie.
I want to go for Colbie Caillat’s show at Laundry this Friday.
I need passes.
I need to dance.
I have to start planning my tattoo already. It’s almost the 16th.

I am going to sleep.

I’M AN OFFICIAL BUMMER NOW. Been bumming so much lately. Nothing progressive happens anymore unless you count that one day I almost went to every college in Subang and PJ to inquire about the course I intended to take but ended up at almost every tattoo parlour I’ve heard of with EVERY ONE OF THEM CLOSED. Bolded the almost, but and with for sarcasm purposes. Or that couple of days I went for dance practice in KimV’s house. Or that.. Fuck, cannot think of any more days.Now there’s no point of me typing all that, I’m just typing away whatever there’s on my mind while listening to Colbie Caillat. *grins*

Amy and I plan to work at QQ. QQ was where I used to work at during the middle of last year. F&B again, I know but hey, I know them people there and they cannot be compared to people in TGIF. Them at QQ are kawans. The pay per hour for a part timer is the same as TGIF, free food and drink provided and no pressure at all. So yeah, we’ll see how it goes.

RESULTS NEXT WEEK! Every single time the topic pops up in my head, I get nervous. I bet you guys are too lah. We’re so fucked.

After three months of not clubbing together, Amy and I did last night. With Hashok and almost the entire staff of Republic, Sunway. I think we met everyone last night. Ashwin and Syed Faisal planned this. Lubendran was there too. He’s still as tall as ever. We partied at Bar Celona. My second time there and I’ve already thought the DJ sucked. The playlist were practically looping the whole night. Amy got wasted.

Ooh. I like Republic. It’s not officially opened yet but I like it already. Really good place to chill at and I liked the music the DJ played. I think there are no dance floor though.

Sial lah. I want a ‘All Girls Night Out Clubbing Session‘! I think most of my girlfriends don’t club. Tsk tsk.

No pictures again! Am not bothered to charge my batteries nor bring out my camera anymore. Maybe tomorrow. Amy, Hashok and I are going shopping at Bangsar.

You know what, one of these days I’m going to post up potraits of every friend I’m going to mention because I realised what’s the point of me typing out their names when you don’t know who they are. So pictures of them will help and who knows maybe my friends are your long-lost-kiddygarden friends. Ahhhh! I’m a genius. Malaysia is not that big, you know.

Not today. Not today.

Who is going? I plan to go and I’ve already redeemed for my free tickets with Digi but I’m not sure if I’m going to get it. I’ll only find out on Monday. If I don’t, I gotta see if boyfriend is going or not since I don’t know who else to go with. So who is?

There’s a Nike Women event coming up on the 22nd of March. I plan to attend since there’s going to be really fun activities going on. Only problem is I have no bloody idea where is the venue located at. Tension. There’s also going to be a gig in Klang but I’ll blog about that another time.

Lazy dah.