I have made the decision to stop blogging.
I won’t shut down this site because I sayang this site a lot sial.
Lotsa memories in words weh.
But yeah, byeeee!

I will probably still blog somewhere else since I find it easy to express my feelings through typing. Like typing very hard on the keyboard. LOL.

On a happier note, I’M GOING PENANG!
Fucking happy sial. Finally I get to go away from here.
Although only for this weekend.

Love, yours truly.

I am intoxicated with alcohol right now so forgive me for whatever I say.

How was your Merdeka’s Eve?
I spent it drinking and smoking at home in PJ.
Nothing usual like me and my parties.
I admit I was a bit upset when we did not head out but Vix made it up. (:
No baby, I’m not just saying. I’m serious. It was a great one..

I mean I did not understand why I was upset.
I always thought going out for eves are usually troublesome.
The roadblocks, the raids, the fuckingsprayingthing, the jam and the RUDE ASS PEOPLE THAT SHOVE YOU IN THE CROWD.
I figure, I was probably too fucking restless over the past two weeks.
Sue me and you still won’t get an answer why. I’m as clueless.

There are drum sticks (or whatever they are called) on my computer table.
I think my brother is learning.
Righttttt. Lol.
My fingers are freezing. Fuckkkk.
Oh, Amy said Avril’s concert was boring.

No point. This entry has no points.
Night.

Today had not been a very good day at all.
I’m currently in a terrible mood, ready to shout, scream or strangle anyone that comes along and trigger my switch.

Not being able to go to Avril’s concert did not make the day any better.
Got free tickets but I have to pass them on to Amy because I have a performance tomorrow.
Bloody hell. Why did they have to call today instead of last week?! Grr.

I’d like to watch her perform her first two albums.

Tsk. Right, so people, where to for Merdeka?

Lately, I’m hooked onto Youtube more than usual.
Here’s another video I think most of you should watch.
It’s a video of two friends dancing together for an annual competition in Beijing.
The guy lost his leg and the girl lost her arm in an accident yet they performed so beautifully.
I do not know whether you have come across it but if you have not, take your time and enjoy this beautiful piece.

I recently told Amy about this video showing a bunch of men surrounding a girl, hitting her, kicking her, stripping her and finally stoning her to death. I’m sure you have either seen it on your friend’s phone or online but do you know the real story?

I first came across it when WilliamLoo showed me on his phone. Then, I read about it on a female magazine but the article did not mention much.

*thefuckinginternetconnectioninftzsuckballscantevengoongoogletosearchupthelink*

Just search up ‘Kurdish girl stoned to death’ and you will have results.

Click on the image for the full size.

Do your part and come support. Afterall, it’s for a good cause. (:

Back in PJ, our heater is dead. So every single day, I wake up feeling afraid to enter the cold bathroom. It is torturing okay! Now that I’m back in KLG for the night. I appreciate my heater really much. I will now go and shower before I continue this entry. Lalalaaa.

Well yeah, I’m blogging regularly again. Can’t help it, I try to update at any chance I have.

The whole week has been a pain in the ass for me. Classes, period cramps, dance practices and assignments. Which reminds me, I have one due this Monday. Fuck. It is not that I’m slacking and do not bother about my assignment. Every night I get home from college, I’m drop dead tired. I will have dinner, I will try to destress by watching television (note : does not help at all), I will talk to Vix, I will try to sleep and eventually end up in bed, staring up at the ceiling for ages before falling asleep. The only day I had to work on my assignment was on Wednesday. That too I needed to ask for permission to leave early from practice. It’s fucked up man.

This whole TTNight thing is killing me for real. Thank goodness there’s another week left till it’s over for good. Can’t wait to have a freaking life back. I do take the whole thing seriously but I think most of them involved in the committee are taking it over the board. And no, I don’t plan to explain what’s TTNight. I admit I sometimes have fun. I admit I met and made a lot of new people and friends but fuck, this shit drove me to the point where when I’m dancing, I feel no passion. There are no feelings involved anymore. It’s purely about getting the routine done on time for the committee members to see and then get screwed for the mistakes. Then get screwed some more for being late for post mortem, get screwed for leaving home early (9.30pm), get screwed for dressing comfortably in college, get screwed, get screwed, get screwed. Kanineh. What happened to encouraging and motivating? Every single time we step up one step, you push us down another three steps. Perfect strategy lah kan.

I’m not hating, I’m ranting. I’m so sick and tired. When I say I’m tired, I mean physically and mentally and I swear to god, I am not being dramatic. I can feel it draining the fucking energy out of me. I don’t even feel like me.

I need a break. I need it so bad. To recover and to study.

To make it worse, I’ve made the decision to move out soon. And no, there is nothing wrong with my relationship. There are just things that are wrong with me. I’m so different than before, now I’m afraid of myself and for myself. Sometimes these thoughts manifest themselves so freely, I cannot control them and myself. Fuck.

I don’t intend to rant but I need to let it out somewhere. You know where the ‘X’ is.

Moving on to happier notes, my co-curicular activity started this week. I joined the swimming club. Yes, I am aware that I can’t swim. The reason why I joined is because they offer free lessons! I am able to float now.

At least this Saturday, I had a good time. Amy and I with her college friend, Sarah went to Urbanscape at KLPac in the evening. We got lost from Setapak to Sentul. For two freaking hours. Today proves one small mistake can take you very far because Sentul is like right beside Setapak. Lol. Our main objective at Urbanscape was to shop. We obviously got lots of cheap goods. I, myself spent less than RM100 and got new a skinny, new shirt, new top and a new bag. I forgot what Amy bought besides the I Heart KL tee. Sarah bought herself the brightest pair of flats. Red flats. She could not wait to rock them in college. Met a number of familiar faces there. In the end, Q managed to get tickets to enter the main stage to join Mika. Right on time for Seven Collar T-Shirt and Pure Vibrations. Thinking back, I would have had a better time if I had beer to drink like everyone else but being a chinese I did not allow myself to pay RM13 per can for a Tiger. God, I hate events like these. Always try to rip off us off when it comes to alcohol. Lol.

Kay lah. I’m going off to bed. Toodles world.

It’s disgusting how pretentious people are. I don’t know if that’s the right word to use but I’ll go along. I mean I was thinking about this for weeks and had only discuss openly with Amy so it was rather funny when Vix mentioned how I’m like that too when I told him about the incident at the mall in Klang. We’ll not get into that.

What he meant was people generally are like that and I get that. Thinking back, I’m pretty disgusted with myself.

I’ve been going through FB and Friendster as usual whenever I get the chance and these social networking sites are the perfect example for the topic today. You see people you don’t like, you like, you don’t know, you hate, you loathe, you envy, you admire, you idolise, etc on your friend list and you know only half of them. The other half is divided into two quarters where one, people you wish you are friends with in reality and the other quarter, people you only know by name and had only talk to online through IM softwares whose email too you hustle crazily to get.

Are you following me?

I know people who backstabs people they have never met and today, it appears they are girlfriends. I’ll never sunk myself to that level eventhough I pretend at times. No point trying to prove to the world I’m all that ‘real’ right? We all know the truth about ourselves. It’s good to have contacts here and there but contacts are contacts, friends are friends. Why mix two totally different matter together? Makes things complicated.

I don’t know how I’ll end this topic but I’ll stop here. Maybe another day.

…I’d like to elaborate about them but I’m tired and I need to rush back to PJ now so we’ll save it for next time.

Naqib posted up pictures of his 22nd birthday at Laundry and I stole some from his album on FB. Damn sad lah okay. My camera is a piece of crap so I’ve not bothered to take it out and my Polaroid kinda dieded for good.

Kay lah. At least now my post got a few pictures. DAMN SAD LAH WOI. At least I bought a new umbrella. Yay!

I think I have this habit of coming up with post titles that has nothing to do with my entry content.

(started changing the layout of my myspace profile for a good one hour)

Right, back to whatever I have to say. I’m currently blogging at the comfort of my own home and computer. It feels wonderful. I get to sit here as long as I want without worrying about how much an hour, no wait, scratch that, one minute would cost me if I was at a cyber cafe. I’m looking after my sister while my mom is out on her date. Yes, my mom is dating. She finally admitted to us. There are a bunch of men trying their luck but my mom ain’t one easy fish to catch. She wasn’t easy back then, she still ain’t easy now. I’ve yet to meet any one of these men but Tommy and Xin had and I trust their judgement.

And no, I do not and will not blame my mom for dating so soon. I’m thrilled that she is. She’s been through so much and too long, she needs changes. I know her well and she assured us she will not settle down. Obviously. Lol.

I am currently feeling very unwell and yet very in love. Weirdo, I am. Laugh Me, You Will Not. Cause I’m rarely this happy and it is almost unreal to me. I am appreciating every single moment before it goes away because at the end of the day, you will only have the memories and nothing else. At times the relationship gets tough due to my temper and snappiness. I’m a real witch but hey, he always managed to bring the worse and the best out of me whenever and wherever. My ego can be as big as *insert whatever* and to hear me apologise after a fight is almost scarce yet he manage to without a sweat.

I never took horoscope seriously but in this case, Leo and Leo. Tsk tsk tsk. We are arrogant bastards. Lol.

“..keep it low, hit the phone.. blablabla.. whoopsie. whoopsie. blablabla..” - iTunes on shuffle lah.

Tommy is a champion. Vix himself did not have the master copy of Whoopsie and Tommy has it. Champion.

I cannot wait until this month is over. There’s nothing really interesting to look forward to, I think. Date Week is over. The whole weekend was perfect. Early morning shopping, new haircut and buffet dinner (minus him not getting his wings whatever). I’m glad we came up with this Date Week thing. Makes every month easier to go through.

Kay lahhh. I’m lazy. I want to download new tracks. Plus, I doubt people read much anymore. LOL.

April 27th was the last I updated this blog. Today is the 2nd of June. Tsk tsk.

I was working during May and had been staying in KJ with no internet connection thus why I did not post anything at all. Believe me, there were so many moments during work that I wished I could go online and write a post. So many brilliant (lol) ideas lost. Sigh.

Now that I’ve started college, I miss working. At least at work, I had fun with my colleagues and arguing with pissed off Australians. In case you were wondering, my job was to call up Australian merchants to ask them questions for a survey.

Truth to be told, I do not mind travelling so far for classes. I’m used to that now. It’s just I absolutely hate it when I get here at 8freakingam to have walked all the way to the lecture hall, to learn that class has been cancelled. It ruins your mood totally. Think about the extra hours I could have to sleep in the comfort of my floorbed, bolster and baby.

Oh, I started college two weeks ago. I skipped the whole Orientation Week except for the first day to report myself. Had to work lahh. I skipped the first class on the first day of the semester too. LOL. Champion. (: I am currently an official student of TARCollege.

I have pictures to post for an event I attend yesterday. It was a graffiti competition organized by Hugo Boss and Juice at Zouk. Vix was emcee so Sajeev and I dropped by. Tribe Tattoo & Body Piercing had a booth there and sial lah, they brought their famous 50% discount there. I can’t transfer the pictures from my phone to upload online because I’m using one of the pcs in the college lab.

That’s how I spent my last weekend. I think for the past month, all my weekends had been really boring. Nothing exciting because all I ever do is sleep. Catching up with my beauty sleep because I never have enough during the weekdays.

Classes usually start in the morning till the evening then after class I have dance practice until 9pm. By the time I get home it’d be late and I’m already exhausted from the whole day’s activities. This cycle repeats itself for 5 continuous days.

Time management is now a very important thing to me. I either have to learn to manage my time right or risk failing my subjects. I have to juggle between classes and practices which includes both in college and Subang. We (the old ones lol) joined Hop2DaBeat at Metropolitan, SJ last Saturday and we got through to the preliminary round. Best competition I ever been to, worst performance I ever showed. I’m speaking on a personal judgement here. I disappointed myself that day.

There are currently so many thoughts running in my mind till I’m finding it hard to sleep some times. Yes, even when I’m physically dead. My brain is running with all this thoughts and must-dos that I’m stressing myself out eventhough it’s only the second week of college.

I am a lucky girl to have friends like Amy who I’ve not been able to spend as much time I’d like with because of then work and now college. Lucky she had not rip off my head yet for being so distant. Lol. I’m also lucky to have a boyfriend like Vix that I swear is the sweetest thing alive ever. Lucky that my mommy is so caring despite moving out from her house. I know that’s one of the hardest thing a parent can go through.

Okay okay. Emo Alert! I think I better sign off already. I have things to attend to and I need to have breakfast before class starts. I will update more often now that I know how to work around the slow connection in this lab. Teehee.

I’m looking forward to this weekend. It’s Date Week.

I’m a very very happy girl, right now.
I’m in love.
I’ve said yes to something I thought I’d never be ready for.
I’ve even considered having two.
I consider myself really lucky.
I think I’ve gone mental.
I’m glad with the outcome of the General Election.
I love spending time with *the people.
I love our time together.
I’m falling too many times in love with the same person, I think it might kill me. Lol.
I’m worried about my results.
I feel like kicking Taufoo for not calling.
I enjoy working 4 days a week.
I am glued to tracks from artist like Colbie Caillat, Robin Thicke, Sara Bareilles, Taylor Swift & Uffie.
I want to go for Colbie Caillat’s show at Laundry this Friday.
I need passes.
I need to dance.
I have to start planning my tattoo already. It’s almost the 16th.

I am going to sleep.

I can’t sleep, again. I think I’m having insomnia. That and also I think because my grandma and her maid took over my bed.

Tonight had been a crazy night. There’s a video. I had fun and it’s been quite some time since I did had fun like this. Whatdakwan! LOL. *inside jokee* 

Been fucking tension since the moment I took the towel off my head in the saloon. The color obviously didn’t turn out the way I wanted it to be. IT’S FUCKING GOLD. The stylist said the color will fade off and turn out right BUT I CANNOT WAIT FOR A MONTH! According to her, it takes that long and the times I wash my hair. Does it really work like that? I have no clue man. I main dengar aje.

I told everyone that cared to listen that I’m going to lock myself in my house for a month. And if I really had to step out of the house, I’m wearing a freaking cap. AND I HATE CAPS. Makibai. OH WAIT. HOODIES! I’m going to steal every single fucking hoodie any of my friend owns just to hide my fugly hair.

And to think back I was so excited. Goddamnit.

First thing I did after seeing the outcome, texted my boyfriend. ‘You are so gonna dump me.’ Oh trust me love, it is that bad.

Kay kay. I’ve just googled out the problem and it seems like the whole fading hair color thing works. HOT WATER BABY! But it might fuck it up to a worse condition. I’ll give it a try man. And if one month it doesn’t work, I’m heading back to the stylist.

Tension.

Go onnnn laugh at me. Hmph.